Cruise News 10/10/18
Never trust anyone who looks like a disgraced pop star from the late ’80s.
The police in Columbus, Ohio are hunting for two thieves who’ve used fake IDs to get into to at least half a dozen gyms. And then, once they’re inside, they use bolt cutters to break into a bunch of lockers to steal other guys’ wallets.
And the main feature of these two dudes is . . . they look exactly like… MILLI VANILLI.
The detective who’s heading up the case says, quote, “The running joke is Milli Vanilli. And, yes, maybe they do look like Milli Vanilli.”
Like Milli Vanilli, physically, they have long hair that’s done into thin braids . . . and, on a more meta level, they’re pretending to be someone they’re not… to make money.
Anyway, the cops are hoping for help tracking them down . . . but so far they don’t have any leads.
Even if they catch them, the interview will be pointless though, they’ll just move their lips and not say a word, or, they’ll just blame it on the rain.
